2013 Summer Releases: Yes Or No


The flowers are blooming, birds are chirping, and my Summer Movie Preview edition of Entertainment Weekly has arrived in the mail. Looking ahead at what could be a very entertaining summer, I’m picking 5 movies I am TOTALLY looking forward to and 5 movies that I will probably suck.


1. Man Of Steel (June 14)
It’s another reboot of a franchise that has been lagging. Despite the fact that we were tortured with a remake in 2006 that failed to spark any audience and was considered a flop, DC Comics hasn’t given up on its tentpole character and apparently this may be the beginning of a future “Justice League.” film. After watching the trailers that have been coming out since last winter and with Zack Snyder directing this time, this has potential to be HUGE! Oh yeah…and the guy who wrote the latest Batman films is in on the action also (Christopher Nolan), so Supes has THAT going for him as well.


2. Iron Man 3 (May 3)
I can’t deny…I am a SUCKER for all the super hero films and Robert Downey’s take on Iron Man is dead on. He IS Tony Stark and in the 2 previous IM films and last summer’s “The Avengers,” he is exactly what I see whenever I think of Marvel’s drawn character. Throw in a super badass bad guy, Ben Kingley’s “The Mandarin,” and what looks like an army of Iron Men and this movie looks like prime popcorn and soda material!


3. Elysium (August 9)
Matt Damon & Jodi Foster team up with “District 9” director, Neill Blomkamp, to do a science fiction movie about the have’s and the have-not’s. Setting it far into the future, our world is split between the super rich & the super poor. The rich live on Elysium. The poor live on Earth. And when everyman Damon finds that he is irradiated, he decides to break into Elysium to find a cure for himself. Expect lots of action and plenty of thought-provoking modern day comparisons in this one.


4. This Is The End (June 12)
A movie about movie stars playing themselves at a party at the end of the world? That’s the premise and I’m all in! Stars Seth Rogan, James Franco, Emma Watson and a cast of thousands! Ok…maybe not thousands…but it sounded good. And the trailer looks “SWEET!”


5. The Great Gatsby (May 10)
This one could go either way. The trailer looks awesome and the cast is top notch (Leonardo DiCaprio, Carey Mulligan, Tobey Maguire), but there is something about so much green screen work that worries me. We all know the story about Jay Gatsby (considering the book by F. Scott Fitzgerald has been made into film 5 times prior) so you have to wonder if the guy who brought us the stylized remake of Romeo & Juliet can break it down in a new way. If it’s HALF as good as the trailer…I say yes. Either way, it looks like a MUST-SEE on the big screen!



1. R.I.P.D. (July 19)
It looks like a poor man’s remake of “Men In Black” with the 2 heroes being dead instead of alien chasers. A horrible premise is made even MORE horrible by the trailer with Jeff Bridges playing the crusty, old-timer part instead of Tommy Lee Jones and Ryan Reynolds as Will Smith. I say avoid this one like the plague.

2. The Lone Ranger (July 3)
Why, Johnny Depp? Why? From the first time I saw who was in this movie I thought…”What is up with that?” Then I saw that Depp was playing Tonto and NOT the masked man and I had to wonder…”What is up with that?” And then after seeing the trailer last winter and again and again since I’ve been wondering…”Why?” This looks like ANOTHER Will Smith movie from 1999 called “Wild, Wild West” which was a complete mess. No way I’m seeing this in the theater…

3. The Heat (June 28)
Sandra Bullock, try as she might, is NOT a comedian. Actually, as much as I WANTED to like her in “Miss Congeniality,” I found her stiff and boring. This movie looks a LOT like that one except you have Melissa McCarthy added as comic relief. I dunno about the whole “women can do comedy” thing (I thought “Bridesmaids” was ok…), but this doesn’t look funny at all. I imagine I’ll watch it when it comes to USA Network sometime next winter.

4. Planes (August 9)
I know my kids will WANT to see it, but I loved “Cars” so much and this looks like Disney is simply taking all of the Cars characters and throwing them into the air…literally. What was once a direct-to-DVD venture, the Mouse House has decided it needs to soak up more of your hard earned cash and so they’re putting this one in theaters. I say avoid it. You have been warned.

5. Fast & Furious 6 (May 24)
Six?!?! They’ve made SIX of these things??? Unbelievable. Vin Deisel could probably retire from making movies with the amount of cash they pay him to look muscled up for this role. Let’s see if I can get you the plot in 2 sentences or less: Bad guys are really good guys and they steal from the rich. Everyone drives fast and there are lots of crashes. Good enough? Yeesh.


Here are a few flicks I plan on seeing. Dunno if they’re gonna be what I’m expecting but…I’m a sucker for blowing my hard-earned money in the theater air conditioning…

1. Star Trek Into Darkness
C’mon…it’s STAR TREK. The first one was damn good and the cast was dead on. Let’s hope the movie is as exciting as the trailer!

2. The Hangover Part III
The Final Chapter? I hope so. But despite the fact that II sucked, there is something about this that looks funny to me. They’re saying this one is darker. I’ll be the judge of that.

3. World War Z
It’s got zombies and Brad Pitt. What that means is anyone’s guess. It looks like a combo of “I Am Legend” and “28 Days Later.” Let’s hope it’s MORE like “28 Days Later.”

4. Kick Ass 2
I liked the first one and this one has Jim Carrey. So sue me. I’m in!

hit-girlSee it…or else.


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